“Museum Find Proves Exotic ‘big Cat’ Prowled British Countryside a Century Ago” the headline on a news item at the Science Daily web site tells us. Anyone who’s been around house cats over the years and really paid attention should find this chilling. Where did the ‘big’ ones go and who is secretly breeding them and stoking their natural hatred of humans? That’s what is undoubtedly happening. They’re coming.
Those who are concerned about the proliferation and increasing prominence of conspiracy theories and denials of one supposedly settled bit of science or history after another need to rethink their approach. In the increasingly fragmented world of…news??…one of the most effective ways to gain some notoriety (and who doesn’t want that?) is to either come up with a fresh conspiracy theory or to double-down on an existing one. Science offers a daily truckload of possibilities.
What’s behind this strange call for “marriage equality” that’s slowly taking hold in the U.S.? Prominent TV “thinkers” have already put forward the notion that the ultimate goal is to allow human/animal unions. Their proof? Let me help.
“Humans Passing Drug Resistance to Wildlife in Protected Areas in Africa.” Thanks to a study in EcoHealth for the tip. How exactly is this “passing” accomplished? Don’t allow yourself to think about the fact that it involves a banded mongoose. Extrapolate if you must (and you should).
It gets worse. “Humans Feel Empathy for Robots: fMRI Scans Show Similar Brain Functions When Robots are Treated the Same as Humans.” The excessively named Astrid Rosenthal-von der Putten and others at the University of Duisburg Essen are responsible for letting this news get out. If it makes people feel warm and fuzzy to treat a machine like a human, civil unions are an inevitable result. What could possibly come from that except more robots…and fewer humans? That’s the goal. The government is most likely behind it.
More proof? “Robot Hands Gain a Gentler Touch: Tactile Sensing Technology Builds on Tiny Barometer Chips.” As if the gentle and no doubt very pleasant touch isn’t dangerous enough, just try to avoid it. The technology developed at Harvard(!) produces “a robot that knows what it’s touching…it can pick up a key and use it to unlock a door.” Graduate student Leif Jentoft is the co-creator of this thing, and it’s easy to picture his Friday evening date.
Here’s a gift to a couple of conspiracy groups. You’re welcome. “Maya Long Count Calendar Calibrated to Modern European Calendar Using Carbon-14 Dating.” Featuring what are clearly random numbers, this study in Scientific Reports fails to acknowledge the space alien origin of both the Mayans’ origins and also their subsequent disappearance. Then it throws in the Carbon-14 dating smokescreen which is always dredged up to supply “evidence” or even “proof” when questions arise about the brief history of Earth, the universe, and important items of old clothing.
The goal of animals and/or robots to eliminate us, cleverly masked by the above mentioned steps toward one type of intimate connection or another, is inadvertently given away in “Self-Medication in Animals Much More Widespread Than Believed.” Aha! So much for insecticides and various poisons designed to control their feverish hyper-breeding. The gentle-touch robots can crank out antidotes and paw-friendly syringes at a rate we can only imagine, allowing the animals to counter our every move. At the same time, the animals clearly don’t recognize the danger inherent in their nefarious deal with their cyber-partners. Once we’re out of the way, what purpose will any form of carbon-based life serve? Think about it Rags and Fluffy.
In the meantime, humans continue to ignore the clear danger, treating pets with far too much deference and even favoritism. “Parents Tend to Share More Bacteria With Family Dogs Than Children.” The awkwardly written headline gives the impression that parents actually share children with family dogs, but not as much as they share bacteria. Well, usually not. What Rob Knight and others at the University of Colorado Boulder found is that “the microbial connection seems to be stronger between parents and family dogs than between parents and their children.” Shameful. Dogs are more than capable of locating and ingesting bacteria on their own.
We are our own worst enemy…almost…except for all of those others.
Furthermore…just a second…uh oh. Never mind.